Sunday, April 25, 2010

Once Upon a Time

I'm going to Disney World.
I'm going to find Prince Charming.
I'm going to give him a kick in his charming lil...
Oh Hello Amber...
What am I doing?  I'm just writing a modern day fairy tale...
What is it about? Well, I'll let you read it after you start dating.  Go back to bed.
Now...where was I?
Oh Yeah, Prince Charming and all of his charming, ummm,  assetts?
Somewhere along the path of life, I have realized that I've been duped.  Which is sad.  But what is sadder still, is that I am not the only one.  Now I can't claim to have the official numbers, nor have I done any poll.  But I dare say the majority of women have been duped as well.  Somehow, we have been taught to think that there is a Prince Charming that will come in and know exactly what to do and say plus how to smell and look.  And we want him to know all of this, all by himself.  We can't tell him what to do or it takes the meaning away.  Somehow, we have listened to enough songs, watched enough movies, and read enough books to believe that some perfect form of a man (well at least perfect for us, as we tell ourselves is reasonable to believe exists) will walk up to us with our hair a mess, no make up on, while we are trying to decide whether our car needs 10w40 or 5w30 or that new Valvoline stuff that is suppose to be Eco Friendly and smells like a cool summer breeze, offer to change the oil in our car and fall madly, deeply, truly, never even look at another woman blinded by our natural and inner beauty kind of love.  Though many will read this and pretend I have lost my mind - in all honestly we have some sort of a fantasy like this.  Why wouldn't we?  We started out with the stories of Snow White and Cinderella, matured to the likes of Romeo and Juliet, moved on to the Titanic and now have settled with The Notebook to guide as to what true love is.  So yes, I blame Prince Charming, Leonardo DiCaprio, and even that cute blonde dude in The Notebook.  They set a standard, and most of the average Joes I have met, fall quite below that standard.  Hence, my decision to meet Prince Charming and explain that he could have a few flaws for us to see.

UPDATE!

I went to Disney World.
Saw Prince Charming.
Walked up to him, however, he was too busy chatting up some cute 21 yr old blonde who clearly has yet to see the effects of gravity or children upon her body.  Dang it, Blondes really do have all the fun!  (Sarah, maybe instead of red, next time we do blonde????)
I realized though that the movies make him look taller (seriously, he is probably only 5'4) and he has the attention span of a squirrel, considering every time a princess walked by he was winking and sharing the mischevious grin (apparently Blondes aren't his only cup of tea).  Funny enough, I found him to not be that charming afterall.  How did that happen?  Perhaps - flaws are part of the package and they just left that out of the stories???
Lesson learned - we all have our once upon a times, and we all will have our happily ever afters.  However, there is a lot of mess, covered with a whole lot of flaws in between the two of those, and perhaps, just maybe that is the way it is suppose to be. 

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

My Waldon

Once upon a time a man ventured out to the edge of town to live in a modest cottage in order to learn. He had several points he wished to make as he set off on this goal. One was to live a life of self-sufficiency which equated to him living minimally.
At the beginning of this year, I set out with a goal for the month of January. I was to become vegan. This decision was only made to see if I had the will power and determination to do something most considered impossible. I didn't know what to expect as I set off on this adventure but I what I found was a profound lesson of minimalism. I learned that there is indeed a difference in what I NEED to have to survive and what I WANT. Often times those lines are blurred. I need protein and complex carbs. I want steak and and potatoes covered in butter. I need fluids such as water. I want a chocolate milkshake.
As the month came to an end, I looked back upon my experience and contemplated how I could take this approach in other areas of my life. Never fear, I will not be throwing away the 50 some odd pairs of shoes I have in exchange for a pair of old Birks. I will however further my pursuit to cleanse my home, body and spirit as I find the right balance of need and want because in the end we will always have a little of both!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me...no more.

I wrote this about 2 or 3 yrs ago however feel the sentiment still rings true.

In fairy tales, we read of poor unfortunate women beginning whisked
away by Prince Charming to a life of love, pleasure and ease. In
movies we see men overcoming all odds to find the woman they are meant
to be with and loving them at first sight or first spoken word. This
is not romance nor love to me.

People joke because I don't accept gifts from guys – they tell me "hey
it's just a shirt why not take it?" or even better "but how cool
would it be to have a new tv?" I live a life full of theories. I
believe a gift has to be proportional to the amount of time spent with
the person (1 month does not constitute a new TV) and how much the
person cares for you. If those to factors aren't right, something is
wrong. Yes, I love receiving gifts but not because of the gift but
because of the emotion and thought put into it.

Moving on – Romance and love are not instant. It can not be
manufactured nor manipulated. It takes time. Patience. Knowledge.
To me, romance comes from love that is brewed over time. Yes, there
are romantic moments from the beginning of all relationships. But in
the end what I am looking for is someone who knows me…inside out – my
little quirks. What do I do when I am thinking? Or when I am
nervous? What are my goals…do you plan on helping me achieve them as
I plan on helping you? Can you tell when I am uncomfortable and try
to get me out of those situations? Are you willing to put yourself on
the back burner when needs be because heaven knows I will.

Romance isn't about big grand gestures – it's the little, tedious, day
in and day out activities that show love. Anyone can buy clothes,
flowers, electronics, jewelry – but it takes someone who loves with a
true love that is willing accept my flaws – someone who knows that I
love food from road side vendors and is willing to take the risk to
enjoy it with me – someone who when I am sick is there still doing all
of his responsibilities but also taking on some of mine – someone who
loves my smile and is willing to do anything to see it. And that, my
friends, is your challenge – make me smile and I am yours.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Meandering Musings

With a lifetime of lessons bearing upon my shoulders, I woke up this morning with an intense desire to write. As many may know, I write on a regular basis, but rarely ever share those intimate thoughts. Why not start? Or should I say start again? Back to the lessons - this past year has been interesting, as my life has taken a course of its own and though I am in control, I found it intensely satisfying to let go of the reins and see where I was led. In doing such, I have learned much. Some of those lessons I will freely share however there are some poignant thoughts that will remain solely mine.
Be patient as I ramble through thoughts and hope it finds some sort of direction and meaning.
About a month ago I had the pleasure of going to dinner with a friend, we spoke of writing and he mentioned a few lines he had jotted down recently. One stuck out to me and left me with such an impression that I pondered it and really took in the imagery it left me with. I hope he forgives me for making reference to it however without the quote you will not understand the lessons I gleaned from it.
"Time exacts no returns, and opportunity remains a premium of the ticking clock" A. Wood
As he uttered those words to me I automatically was struck with awe as all I could envision was an old Grandfather clock, the pendulum swinging to mark the seconds and the gong to mark the hour. For the week after, my thoughts enclosed upon that clock and how it represented my life. The pendulum being the day in and day out tedium of our lives, what there is to be done with no question - we move back and forth to accomplish the needs of our day. What struck me most though was the gong - I picture that gong to either be the death toll of another day in my life wasted to meaningless actions and motions of nothingness or that of a celebrating chorus reminding me to come out and appreciate that I took full advantage of all the opportunities presented to me within any given time. Fortunately, my life has held both actions and for that I know there are still much more I must learn.
I look forward to this upcoming year to do such.